The afternoon of February 15, 2010, just after one o'clock, is once such moment in my life. I can remember it with crystal clarity all these years later; I suspect that memory will always be razor-sharp. My life changed in that instant. It took less than 30 seconds to hear the words, "Your son's newborn screening came back positive for cystic fibrosis." I can still remember exactly how I felt - as if I had been punched in the stomach and temporarily lost the ability to breathe. Time stood completely still.
It's weird the thoughts that run through your mind as you're grappling to digest such devastating news. I sincerely wondered how people could still be living their lives like nothing happened. I could not process the fact that television shows still aired and people still went to the grocery store and the roads were still full of cars. Laughter fell like discordant music on my ears. I no longer enjoyed activities I once loved. I craved solitude but couldn't stand to be alone. I longed to pour out my broken heart but had no words.
The darkest hour is just before dawn. Time heals all wounds. Courage is not always a roar.
Be still and know that I am God.
"I can't" eventually gave way to "I will." Praise the Lord, I found my way. I found my voice. I found my cause. I found my joy.
Beauty from ashes, indeed.